Category Archives: ~ Bars / Clubs / Restaurants ~

Am opening a bar

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Yea, it’s about time.

After being pushed by various parties, am going into a venture with several partners n investors. It’s gonna be different. (But i bet that’s what they all say!)

Am handling concept, music and marketing.

Sumtin like dat...

Sumtin like dat…

Theme will be 2499, ie futuristic / galactic shit. The entrance will be like a silver flying saucer (arent they all silver? I think i’ll make it purple), and u walk up a small step ladder and end up inside this circular ‘UFO bar’. Of course the effects and blue lighting will add to the buzz.

Leave your light sabers by the door.

It will be  tastefully done; with a loungy setting.

Yeaaa ok, only if they promise to behave

Yeaaa ok, only if they promise to behave

Some joints have what’s known as island bars, ie, a circular bar, with patrons sitting around it. This one will be the other way around fuckdat. The patrons are IN the large ‘island’, and the bartenders on the outside perimeter.

Hovering around their victims..

For special drinks for special occasions, there’s a steel operating table in the centre, where aliens normally dissect abducted humans. But in this case, the ‘victim’ will get a tube down his throat, which will duly be filled with a green cocktail called Alien Urine Sample. By a Martian bartender.

For five bucks extra, we will also taze the mafucker for a minute. (An adult diaper will be provided.)

That’ll make sure he’s buzzed. Haha

Am gonna make staff dress up too; no fun otherwise. Will need a good crew.

Head bartender, Mart

Head Bartender, Mart. Multi-tasker

Cashier, Sal

Cashier, Sal, drug dealer

Floor Supervisor, Shade

Floor Supervisor, Shady. I wouldn’t fuck with him

Am also considering a small-dose cocktail (5ml) that’s real special and one-of-a-kind, coz it’s injected directly into your vein. By a qualified sexy alien nurse of course.

There’s a serious lack of sci-fi-themed bars. In fact, there’s probably none at all. Uncreative pricks.

Tunes will he jazz, swing and house. No 80’s shit for sure.

Halloween at this bar will be extreme fun.

Probably be sumtin like dis:

Chief of security, Al

Chief of Security, Al

Havent finalized the food menu yet. As for bar bites, I hear fried insects are catching on.

As for the name, am thinkin of DeepsHit. Or Martian Hole.

Any suggestions?

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Damn bar bands

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Yea, most of ’em blow, at least as far as their repertoire goes.

It’s kinda crappy that most of them only know how to play 80s shit. Specifically, 80s rock.

(Never understood why people refer to them as live bands. As opposed to what, dead bands? If they there, of course they live. They can’t be streaming right?)

They seem like they stuck in a time warp, not realizing we’re deep into the 21st Century. They wanna play same ol’ 70s n 80s covers, fine, but what about the 90s and Noughties? Too complicated to play? Too lazy to learn? Fuck is dat about?

Can’t handle Radiohead, Coldplay or Red Hot Chili Peppers? If a repeater band / bar band can’t play a classic like Give It Away, they shouldn’t call themselves a rock band, and get the fuck off the stage.

Dave Matthews Band? Fuggedaboutit. Pearl Jam? The Verve? Haha! You gotta be kidding me.

Next time u find yourself being force-fed a dose of same ol, request a track from any of the above groups.  And see what the band says!

Maybe we shd start a Play Something Recent! campaign. They need to get out of their toxic nostalgic fog.

Maybe the vocals, and higher sophistication in 90s music is too difficult to handle.

If a cover band claims it plays classic rock, then it should play 90s rock too, coz dats how long ago the 90s was – two decades now.

Hotel Fuckin California. I swear, dats the most-played song on this planet. Hell, maybe other planets too.

Most of these bands seem to have gone deaf around 1989.

Request for Snow Patrol and you’ll probably get served some cocktail. Haha

To restrict music to one genre (ie rock) is bad enough, but to time-limit within the genre? Too much. Any0ne who know of any options, would love to hear from u.

Creativity. I love it, but i think that’s what’s missing in da scene.

Bar owners share the blame. Maybe coz many of them are uncles themselves. I doubt they even hire music consultants pre-opening. It’s more like, “Hey u know any band?”

“Yea sure, can be arranged.”

“Can play Hotel California?”

“Can!”

“OK deal!”

I’ve seen mafuckers performing with mullets man! Mullets.

Bars need differentiation

Bars need differentiation, not same ol’

The OTHER thing that pisses me off about band music is the fuckin volume. Wattup with dat?

What’s wrong with medium volume for ALL tunes? Why dafuck does the band music need to be on full volume?? The band members might be deaf, but the customers sure aren’t.

There’s really no justification for it. (In fact, i have written a piece here before about how the music (and lighting, and bar furniture) affects people’s drinking speed.)

I mean, there’s no consistency. The regular bar music might be hardly audible (which is usually better than the band’s music), but the band one is waaay too high. High. Low. High. Low. How bout some damn balance? Outlets should increase the bar music, and lower the band’s volume.

Bar bands are meant to be playing in the background. Definitely not the main attraction. Unless it’s a superstar band doin a gig. Even that doesn’t deserve FULL volume, right?

Maybe the bands’ fat egos demand max volumes, i dont know.

The break between sets are sometimes a real relief to the customer. Conversations and drink orders can be audible again. People can mingle.

A band with a difference

A band with a difference

Bar owners need to grow some balls and break away from these dumb traditions. Even once a week on a Friday night would be nice. For a change.

Unless they dont want younger customers, in which case, their establishment might die a slow, natural death.

The Rollin’ Sixers (now-defunct) was an awesome Malaysian band that lit up many bars. Blues rock n shit. And boyz like Blister and Hydra are adventurous. Respect.

Maybe its clueless bar owners, maybe incapable bands, maybe stupid tradition, maybe a mix of all.

I think what pisses me off is that two decades of awesome, solid music has been ignored. Like it never happened.

Dats booshit, man.

They been getting away with crap for way too long.

Maybe bar owners and bar bands haven’t noticed yet, but the alco uncles that they have been repeating the same tunes over and over to for 30+ years, are dying off. It’s time to dust off and update the fuckin playlist already.

Sickodat shit.

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Christmas goodies @ Press Room, BSC

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Had a major gulp n munch session at Press Room (Bangsar Shopping Center) recently, checking out their Christmas specials. Good stuff. (Some of the the below are also available at all La Bodega outlets.)

Some interesting cocktails are available too. We opened with sumtin called Grinch (Creme de Cacao White, peppermint liqueur, Midori, milk). It’s melony n refreshing. And well-balanced – which is a rare thing when it comes to cocktails.

There are light mint flavours too, and the drink’s creamy light green hue looks awesome. (All these cocktails are Rm20.90 nett.)

Am obviously no salad freak, but the prawns in the Press Room Prawn Cocktail were great – fresh n crunchy, with fruity, sweet-sour flavours from the dressing.

Kick-starter

Kick-starter

All these nice pix courtesy of Suanie. (Thanks!)

There were a couple of other salads lying around which i ignored.

The Roasted Pumpkin with White Truffle Oil soup is gooood. Thick n creamy, with random chunks of pumpkin surprises.

Pump it

Pump it

The Steak Tartare here is excellent. Raw beef bits which are tender, fresh, spicy, with pickled bits n herbs adding to the party in your mouth.

Raw session

Raw session

I had the 25th Toast next (strawberry puree, passion puree, cava). Sourish, bubbly & strawberry-like, served in a champagne flute. Pretty OK if you like sour stuff, but it should have been served a lot colder.

I’d definitely have the fish dish again – Sea Bass with sautéed spinach and sun-dried tomato cream sauce. Tender, juicy chunks of white flesh, with just the right marination and baking time.

Looks boring, but it aint

Looks boring, but it aint

And for the traditionalists, there’s Roast Turkey with chestnut stuffing, roasted sweet potato mash and cranberry sauce. It’s a bigass drumstick. Basically, for those who want a caveman meat fest. Would have preferred more sauce / gravy.

Belasah

Belasah

As am cheesy, i dug the Oven-baked Herbed Provolone. Semi-hard, baked cheese. Slightly chewy.

Cheeeeeeeeeeeeese...

Cheeeeeeeeeeeeese…

I enjoyed the Udon Carbonara, with smoky, flavourful duck, and the meat is particularly strong-tasting.

SONY DSC

With shrooms too

Rudolph’s Fuel is an excellent cocktail served in a martini glass. It’s like a strawberry smoothie, with a boost of course – rum. Tilting a lil towards the sweet side, but still very enjoyable, with its ingredients being Matusalem (Platino), banana liqueur, strawberry puree and Creme de Cacao (White).

Pick 'em

Pick ’em

Crème Brûlée with Strawberries was one of the designated desserts. Pretty good.

SONY DSC

But my dessert was Vanilla Sky – Matusalem (Platino) rum, almond syrup, vanilla chai, egg n milk. It’s strong, nutty, with spice hints due to floaters of cinnamon bits (which i thought was chocolate n tried to eat. Bad idea). I wdnt recommend the margarita or mojitos. I tasted mainly sugar n nothing else.

Overall, dining here is a good experience. The atmosphere is nice, the food quality high, and the Christmas cocktails enjoyable. Reservations required – 03 2095-8098.

Merry Christmas everybody! Drink on; rock on!

 

Brain damage: 7.5/10

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A girl in Changkat

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The following post is written by Marta, a reader from Portugal who lives in KL:

I am Marta from Portugal. I have been living in Kuala Lumpur for around three months now, planning to stay a few more!
When I decided to come to Malaysia I believed that it would be a good opportunity to get a “detox”. I mean, no alcoholic drinks for a while… or at least only on rare occasions. The idea that I had was that the drinks here would be expensive (yes that’s true!!) and that being a Muslim-majority country, it would not be common to drink around here (that is not very true!).
Anyway, I ended up living around Bukit Bintang, I guess that if you have been in Kuala Lumpur you are familiar with the area; it is not more than a really busy area with a lot of bars (mainly western style). At first I was not going out much but due to platforms like VibeHero I started discovering the best bars around the area!
Wednesday is “ladies night” around the area, translated as freeflow of cocktails for all the girls. So far so good, it is definitely a good break in the middle of a working week. I usually hit the bars with my girlfriends for some cocktails and dancing.
I would say that frequent (or even not so frequent) in Changkat know about Wednesdays, especially 21’s ladies night that seem to be pretty famous. But you know what? One thing that few people seem to know is that in Changkat, being a girl will get you free drinks EVERY single day. Yes, even on weekends!!

I will share my favorite’s list with you:
Temptations:  free EVERYDAY
In here you can get the house cocktail (different every day and usually pretty acceptable in terms of taste) as many times as you can. The environment is good as you can sit outside and chat with your friends or hit the dance floor if you’re in a dancing mood. They are the only bar that also gives you the pleasure of enjoying free drinks Fridays and Saturdays as well, with the only restraint that the offer ends at 11.

 

Elixir: Say Beer!!
From Tuesday till Thursday you can not only get into Elixir for free but also get a voucher with 4 free drinks.  To get this voucher you only need to give your contact information (I would advise you to ask and  put your name on the list so you don’t have to fulfill a new contact form every time you go there) and you can choose rum, vodka, gin or BEER, four times!! It is the only bar that offers beer so it is definitely one of my l favorites. The only negative point with this bar is that it does not have an outside area and inside the music is always loud (really, really loud). It is the place to go if you feel like dancing!!
Why not: My new fetish
This bar opened not even a few weeks ago and it’s already one of my favorites. So far I have not figured out how the offer works, if it is a daily or just a launching promotion  but the truth is that they offer the best free cocktails in Changkat and you can also choose wine(red wine from Chile). I am more of a wine/beer kinda  gal so this offer fits me like a glove. The environment is super cool and the staff are really nice. Top rate for this one!!
21: The classic
I would say that 21 has the original ladies night. Wednesdays seem to be the busiest nights in this bar. Girls can choose between four different types of cocktails (vodka or gin, melon or cranberry flavors among others). Quantity is up to you but my personal experience tells me you should try not to go over four cocktails in the same night and remember don’t mix different flavors!! (Being a weekday I can tell you that I learned my lesson!!).
With so many offers, it gets hard to choose and even guys needn’t worry! Some bars are already doing “Guy’s Thursday” –  that does not necessarily mean free drinks (yet!!) but it’s a 50% discount.
Enjoy!

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