Hangover rating

Came across this site that has hangover severity ratings. From one-star to five-star hangovers. Pretty funny shit.

Quote from two-star hangover – “The text-messages you sent your girlfriend could use a spell-check, but nothing you regret was said. You’d like to give the creator of Aspirin at least a handjob, and maybe even tickle his balls a little.”

Fortunately i’m only on one-star this morning.

Check it here.


I already knew dat

Well, not really. Just lucky. I just found out (tx to my buddy Gleeson) dat coconut water, the crucial ingredient in one of my cocktails Kelapa Rock, can do a lotta good shit for u.

Dis drink went down like crazy at d blog launch and d first anniversary party recently.

It appears that TIME Magazine has done a feature on d benefits of coconut water, among them, a hangover cure! Haha!

So if u drink Kelapa Rock, u can get whacked AND rehydrate AND cure the potential hangover, with d same drink! Ultracool.

For the health-conscious wackos

Quote: “Coconut water is low in calories and has no fat and a lot less sugar than most juices. But its most important attribute, at least among barflies, is that it is an excellent rehydrater.” Niice.

It goes on to state that “an FAO official noted that the drink contains the same five electrolytes found in human blood (Gatorade has only two). He called coconut water “the fluid of life.” Indeed, in medical emergencies, coconut water has been used intravenously when conventional hydration fluids were not available.”

Daamn. U can stick it straight into your bloodstream?

The magic juice has also recently caught on among athletes. There’s also been a “proliferation of coconut-water cocktails”.

OK, time to come up with more kelapa recipes then.

Kelapa, u memang rock la brudder


Choose yor hangover

Checkdisout. A friend, Doc Kuljit, sent me a mail on hangover severity ratings. Haha! It was produced with the help of alcohol toxicology expert Prof Wayne Jones of the University of Health Sciences in Linkoping, Sweden. Unfortunately, dude did not work on rum and gin.


Hangovers are a bitch, a bitch whose antidote i once wrote about (bacon!). Am waiting for some smart-ass prick to create a hangover cure in a pill. I’ll take a carton right off the bat.

Probably the best-known cure at the mo is staying drunk.

I did some research and the info below seems accurate. Whisky & brandy consistently get high marks for giving hangovers.

So its worth knowing.

If u gotta be an alco, be an informed alco.


Good to know: Vodka is least likely to give you a hangover.
Vodka is made by fermenting grains or crops such as potatoes with yeast. It’s then purified and repeatedly filtered, often through charcoal, strange as it sounds, until it’s as clear as possible. (Some vodkas, like Smirnoff, are triple-filtered, making it as close to clean ethanol as possible.)

CALORIES: Because vodka contains no carbohydrates or sugars, it contains only calories from ethanol (around 7 calories per gram), making it the least-fattening alcoholic beverage. So a 35ml shot of vodka would contain about 72 calories.

PROS: Vodka is the ‘cleanest’ alcoholic beverage because it contains hardly any ‘congeners‘ – impurities normally formed during fermentation. These play a big part in how bad your hangover is.

Despite its high alcohol content – around 40 per cent – vodka is the least likely alcoholic drink to leave you with a hangover.

CONS: Vodka is often a factor in binge drinking deaths (no shit? Haha!) because it is relatively tasteless when mixed with fruit juices or other drinks.




Slow mover: Low in alcohol, beer is the least dangerous to drink.

Beer is made by fermenting barley. Hops are added for flavour and yeast to make the grains ferment into sugar and alcohol.

CALORIES: It’s the most calorie-rich alcoholic beverage – one pint (468ml) contains between 170 and 200 calories.

PROS: Beer is the least dangerous to drink and makes you feel you drunk the slowest. It has the lowest alcohol content – between 3 and 6 per cent for lager, and up to 8 per cent for ale and stout.

A pint also contains more than a quarter of an adult’s recommended dose of Vitamin B folate, which stops the build-up of homocysteinea chemical linked to heart attacks.

CONS: Beer is high in compounds called purines, which boost the levels of uric acid in the blood, according to a study at Massachusetts General Hospital. This can form crystals in joints, leading to painful attacks of gout.

Meanwhile, research published in the International Journal of Cancer showed that one pint a day adds a 10 per cent risk of bowel cancer, while two pints a day increases the risk by 25 per cent.




White wine is made from the fermented juice of grapes stripped of their seeds and skins.

CALORIES: Around 130 calories per 175 ml glass; slightly more in sweeter wines.

PROS: American researchers found that grape flesh contains the chemicals tyrosol and hydroxytyrosol, which help lower artery-clogging LDL cholesterol.

CONS: It’s the sulphites formed naturally or added to white wine as preservatives to stop it going brown, which are the most likely cause of the ‘white wine hangover’ many people complain of.
Sulphites also carry the risk of an allergic reaction which can worsen symptoms such as a headache, or asthma. White wines also wear away tooth enamel faster, making teeth more sensitive.




Red wine is made from fermented grape juice – but unlike white wine, with the skin and pips included. It’s then left to mature for a minimum of three years, during which pigments from the skins leech out and colour the wine red.

CALORIES: Around 120 calories in a standard glass – it’s slightly lower in sugar content than white wine.

PROS: Contains more reservatrol – a plant antioxidant – than white wine. This helps to prevent blood clots and reduce inflammation, which is now considered to play a key role in heart disease. Also, the pips and skins used in red wines contain tyrosol and hydroxytyrosol, chemicals which help lower artery-clogging LDL cholesterol.

CONS: Red wine drinkers can get worse hangovers than beer or white wine drinkers. Because of the way it’s made, red wine produces two types of alcohol – ethanol and methanol. The liver processes the ethanol part of the drink first and leaves methanol until last. ‘As a result, it’s likely to be floating around in the body for a lot longer than ethanol, giving you that familiar “morning after” feeling, says Professor Jones.




Fast-acting baby.

Champagne and sparkling wine are made in roughly the same way as wine – but then more yeast is added and it’s left to ferment in the bottle a second time, producing carbon dioxide.

CALORIES: An average 175 ml glass of Champagne contains 133 calories, slightly more than a glass of white wine because syrup is added to improve taste.

PROS: The antioxidants in Champagne may help protect your brain against damage incurred during a stroke and against neurological disorders such as Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s diseases, according to a team of researchers from the University of Reading. They found that high levels antioxidants, called caffeic acid and tyrosol, helped protect brain cells from damage.

CONS: The bubbles speed up the absorption of alcohol into the bloodstream. And contrary to popular belief, Champagne won’t lift your spirits – alcohol affects brain receptors in the same way, whatever its source.

‘Alcohol basically works in the same way in the brain receptors as Valium,’ says Professor Jones. ‘It depresses brain activity and relieves anxiety. You might think you’re in a good mood, but it’s more likely the result of alcohol causing “disinhibition”, making you more talkative and exhibitionist.’




Whisky or Scotch is distilled from fermented grains, such as barley or wheat, then aged in wooded casks.

CALORIES: About 80 calories per 35ml shot.

PROS: Single malt whiskies have been found to contain high levels of ellagic acid, according to Dr Jim Swan of the Royal Society of Chemists. This powerful acid inhibits the growth of tumours caused by certain carcinogens and kills cancer cells without damaging healthy cells.

CONS: Whisky ‘madness’ – erratic and unpredictable behaviour – is a common problem with drinking whisky. It’s caused by the way most people drink it – neat, explains Professor Jones.
His experiments show that among people drinking the same amount of ethanol, those drinking it in the form of spirits, such as whisky, had the quickest and highest peak in the blood alcohol concentration, which occurred less than an hour after drinking began.

“If you drink any alcohol on an empty stomach, it can compare with getting it intravenously, ” says the prof. (How cool!)

‘To slow absorption down, you could take it very much diluted or along with a rich, calorie-dense ingredient such as cream, as in Baileys or Irish coffee.'”

Whisky also contains lots of congeners, which tend to form during the ageing process in oak casks. A study by the BMA found that as a result, Bourbon Whiskey is twice as likely to cause a hangover as the same amount of vodka.




Hangover hell? Brandy contains high amounts of impurities

Brandy is a spirit distilled from red wine. Fine brandies are aged for extra flavour in wooden casks.

CALORIES: Around 80 in every 35ml shot.

PROS: Because brandy is a distillation of red wine, it contains a high concentration of antioxidants which mop-up ‘free radicals’ which, it’s claimed, can damage the body organs and tissues.
Australian scientists discovered that the antioxidants created during the distilling process mean that 30ml of good brandy would give the equivalent antioxidant hit of the daily recommended intake of vitamin C.

CONS: It could give you the worst headache of all, according to research at London’s National Hospital for Neurology and Neurosurgery. This is closely followed by red wine, then rum, whisky and gin. Not only does brandy contain at least 40 per cent alcohol, the high quality cask-aged variety is likely to have the highest amounts of congeners, which are formed during the lengthy storage and fermentation process.

Professor Jones says:  “Brandy contains literally hundreds of different volatile compounds, which gives it the distinctive pleasant smell but also contributes to the hangover.”



The next time u get trashed, u can come up with your own rating.

Good luck!


Finally, a cure for hangovers!

My biznez partner Susan sent me a link to this article in the Telegraph about bacon sandwiches being a hangover cure. BACON man. Awesome.

Susan is one of them what I call ‘Sympathizers’ to the cause, and to the rebellion (Hmm… What rebellion? Will think of sumtin soon.). She dont drink, but she helps others lose their livers, and dont mind hangin out with alcos n all. Handy, them Sympathizers. We all know at least one, right?

Unlike those who dont drink (or cant drink) n try to preach to u about how ur ruining yor life, bla bla bla. To whom I say “Kiss my golden-brown ass.”

Or is it more of a Baileys-brown?


Anyway, after thousands of years of suffering and wasted next-days, the human race has hopefully discovered the holy grail of drinking – a cure for the billions of Morning-After Blues that has tortured the species over millennia.

Shouldn’t they have sorted dis shit out way back when they invented alcohol? Daam. Slackers.

Them researchers (who’ve finally decided to research sumtin useful for once) in UK say concentrated doses of carbohydrates and protein after some “over indulgence” can speed up your metabolism and provide the amino acids needed to start feeling better. (English translation: Eat bacon!!)

Now, another great reason to get smashed

Now, another great reason to get smashed

Here’s what they say: “”Bingeing on alcohol depletes neurotransmitters, but bacon contains a high level of aminos which tops these up, giving you a clearer head.”

They better not be shittin me man. This is a serious issue.

There’s also an article on other cures, all bullshit mumbo-jumbo ones i assume. Like using voodoo dolls in Haiti, pickled sheep’s eye in bloody Mongolia, lemon in your fuckin armpit (Puerto Ricans).

Gosh, looks like no one on earth has figured it out. Amazing.

For me, only sleep works. If i open my eyes feelin like i’m still in Zouk, hit da sack again right away. But a bad hangover is a bad hangover. Just gotta ride it out.

Have tried hair of da dog. Fuckdatshit. Only got me more high and more moody.

So looks like me n d boyz have been doin it almost right. After a heavy night out,

Stir it up...

Stir it up…

we get busy frying some pork luncheon meat to stuff our faces with.

But dis bacon sandwich thing sounds good. Coz bacon rocks. (If u haven’t yet, u gotta try d bacon ba kwa. Fuh!)

Will organize a hangover and report d results. Volunteers r welcome.

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