D.I.A.

Drink-induced amnesia is a fuckin problem. Every alco has been thru this experience. Also known as blackout, as opposed to d slightly milder but no less confusing brownout, which i wrote about here. (In science terms, DIA is “en bloc blackout” vs “fragmentary blackout” (brownout).)

DIA (not to be confused with but possibly related to d hospital term DOA – dead on arrival), happens with very quick, or excessive consumption of alcohol. Or both.

Liquor mostly. I doubt it works with beer, unless u do helluva lot.

Goes down too easy

U forget stuff dat happened. Like ordering more drinks, then only realizing d next day –  coz yor pockets are outta cash.

Or d last bar u were at. Or driving home. Or even sex! (Similar to cock amnesia.)

I once crossed busy Jln Ampang to get to another party n dont remember that, and d next two hours. Haha

Daaamn.

Unfortunately some people cant behave appropriately when under DIA, and wont even remember it.

Dont remember

Its actually pretty amazing. At the time when ur under DIA, ur generally a perfectly-functioning human, able to do whatever your brain normally does, from the mundane and basic to the complicated, like pissing, havin conversations, calculating cash, driving, eating. But d next day, it’s like it never happened! Was your brain off?

Its like sleep-walking. Kinda weird. I used to sleep-walk too.

I guess over-drinking affects d brain cells dat control short-term memory. It sucks coz many times, u REALLY had a great time, but its been fuckin erased from your memory forever. I think besides a hangover, this is what i hate most about booze.

U gotta rely on eye-witness reports to fill u in. That dont always work either, coz if u dont remember what u dont remember, u wouldnt even ask. So sometimes u’ll NEVER know dat u had DIA.

D other way to jog your memory a lil are photos of d scenes.

Don't remember

Some research done indicates that “These periods of amnesia are primarily “anterograde,” meaning that alcohol impairs the ability to form new memories while the person is intoxicated, but does not typically erase memories formed before intoxication.”

Praise the lord! So its just ‘temporary brain damage’. Cool.

However the prick also concluded that “occurrence of blackouts is a powerful indicator of alcoholism.” Yea right.

There’s also DIA-within-DIA. Besides not remembering d next day, u dont remember during the piss-up what u said like three fuckin minutes ago. Like “where do u live?!”. Askin d same goddam question five times in a night. Dats cause its been documented that your memory in such situations lasts two minutes.

Wow. Fish brain.

Don't remember

This part of the report about ‘state-dependent memory’ is cool – “It is not uncommon to hear stories of drinkers who stash alcohol or money while intoxicated, and locate the hiding places only after becoming intoxicated again.” Haha!

Basically DIA stems from an inability to transfer information from short-term to long-term storage. Your neurons are in a twist. D report notes “a key predictor of blackouts is the rate at which subjects consumed their drinks.” So it happens more to fast drinkers.

I say watch those shots. More than one a minute and ur askin for DIA. One every 90 seconds should be fine.

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Brown-out

Learnt a new phrase from my fave dictionary today, Urban Dictionary.

It’s defined thus – “Less intense than the experience of “blacking out” when drunk and not remembering portions (or all) of your night, “browning out” occurs when you don’t remember something until someone brings it up. It’s not a complete blackout, but partial, because you remember once someone refreshes you.”

Aka fragmented blackout.

Gosh, been there many times. Related to D.I.A – drink-induced amnesia.

Then there’s this other one many guys can relate to – Cock block – A girl who prevents another from scoring sexually.

Usage: Trudy and Dan frequently had time alone but her cockblocking friend ruined any chances they had to have sex.
Yup. We all know them spoilers.
Its normally coz the cockblocks cant score (fugly, boring, sober, etc), so they somehow try to prevent their girlfrens from gettin sum. Haha! Sad but true.

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Booze speak

Alcos dont really have a particular language of their own, unless they’re really gone n start mumbling in Martian. In which case, a Martian interpreter would be required.

So fuggedaboutit. Its a language u dont need to comprehend. Just nod when ur spoken to.

The way i see it, there are 4 levels of highness –

i) the initial one is the Tease – where u feel sumtin goin on. Some pussies would happily always stop at this stage (Recommended drink to get this feeling: beer / stout / cider / wine / easy cocktails like Screwdriver, Mojito)

ii) then there’s the High – ur feelin a good buzz, talkin louder, more sociable, smiling (Recommended drink: Wine, easy liquors like vodka, rum)

iii) the ur There – really intoxicated, all over the place, buying more booze that u dont really need, possibly doin a mutual-groping session, generally very happy (Recommended drink: any liquor, hard cocktails like Long Island)

At this point, its really 50-50 where its goin – ur walkin a fine line, on the edge – u would either maintain this high, or go over to the other side and get wasted, coz the high wants to just feed on itself. Could lead to the fourth stage of..

iv) Drunk – either mumbling or shouting (depending on the person), half-eyes, partial tongue & mouth paralysis, conversing with strangers / the toilet attendant, not remembering names, snogging, lookin for / organizing an after-party, asking the same damn questions / sayin d same things, dont remember how u got home, a possible toilet-bowl-hugger, and finding strange name cards in your pocket / numbers in your phone d next day. Could lead to drink-induced-amnesia. But dats another story. (Recommended drink: skyjuice).

Getting There - its half d fun

Getting There – its half d fun

In the world of drinking, there are some common alco terms – some are standard-issue, some i made up.

Anyway, here’s some basic terms to get u by.

Sotong (squid) = legless / rubber legs. When u legs feel like they’re giving way under u while ur standing / walking. U could also take one step forward and two steps back, making little progress. In such situations, sit dafuck down

Superb sotong demo here

Ketam (crab) = Not as bad as sotong. U walk like a crab, ie sideways (zig-zag), but at least in the general direction. Pretty common occurence

Drink responsibly = make sure u finish your fucking drink! Wastage is highly irresponsible

Aaarh! Bantai ah!! = The term for “cheers!” in Malaysia if there was one. Can be shortened to “Bantaiii!”

Aa, jemput minum… = a more polite version of the above

Silakan...

Silakan…

Ride the train = Drink Night Train and get fucked-up

Brown-out = “Less intense than the experience of “blacking out” when drunk and not remembering portions (or all) of your night, “browning out” occurs when you don’t remember something until someone brings it up. It’s not a complete blackout, but partial, because you remember once someone refreshes you.” (quoted from Urban Dictionary)

Skull / down / yamseng / cuci = To finish your drink off. Other available terms – polish, clear, mop-up

Potong (cut) = when your getting-high is interrupted by something

Turun (descend) = When your high actually comes down due to something, usually something unpleasant. A sobering experience

Lightweight / fairy / pussy = someone who cant drink

Alco = someone who knows how to

High = intoxicated, buzzed, lift-off, tickled, tipsy

And of course, the most number of terms is to describe..

Drunk = smashed, wasted, balls-up, senget, totalled, woman/man-down, OD, bent, gone, terbabas, blazed, fucked-up, whacked, bowl-hugger, out, tit-floored, hammered, sloshed, trashed, shit-faced, sideways, wrecked, pissed, terbalik

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