Here’s sumtin i read online re assumptions made by bartenders regarding their customers, based on what they order.
Malibu & Coke: You vomit easily.
Vodka Cranberry: You don’t know what you want in life, or at this bar.
Patron: Danger. I am adding gratuity to your check.
Gin & Tonic: $$$
Vodka & Tonic: We could be friends.
Long Island Ice Tea: You just broke up with your boy/girl and have chosen tonight as the night you will “move on”.
Foreign Beer: You are on a 2nd or 3rd date, trying to impress the girl with your cultured taste for Turkish pilsner.
Cosmo: For the love of God, hurry up and finish the 6th season of Sex & The City.
Red Bull & Vodka: You’re an asshole.
Pinot Grigio: You are approaching menopause faster than you think.
Pinot Noir: You don’t really go to bars.
Moscato: You listen to too much rap.
Gran Marnier: What are you doing here?
Vodka Martini: You had a serious day at work, or you are a functional alcoholic.
White Russian: Obsessed with The Big Lebowski, and probably The Daily Show. Or, you just like to drink dessert.
Lillet/Campari/Aperol: You’re twee, and possibly like to throw around words like “mixology.”
White wine: You’re definitely a woman. You’re possibly a little uptight.
Prosecco: You’re often a little uptight, but tonight you’re looking to party.
Margarita: All of your relationships have either begun or ended at a wet t-shirt contest.
Whiskey, neat: You’re hot. Regardless of gender.
Jäger: Secretly wishing you were hanging out with your buddies.
Martini: If you’re a guy, you’re trying to impress (and it’s probably working). If you’re a girl drinking a dirty martini, you’re a hot mess: the dirtier, the messier, the hotter.
Vodka on the Rocks: Too self-conscious to actually order a martini.
Singapore Sling: You learned to drink from your mother.
Zombie: No matter what people say, you’re getting along just fine without long-term memory.
Tequila Slammer: You’re down-to-earth. Usually face-down.
I too have got my own assumptions:
Champagne: You like drinking
Cognac: You like drinking
Mojito: You like drinking
Anything with alcohol: You like drinking
